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hopepridestrength
|
2023-07-15 03:41:09
| 1,689,392,469
| 0
|
['matched']
| 0
|
1500zsm
| false
|
I Need Advice 😩
| 1
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1500zsm/getting_back_into_the_dating_world_need_advice_on/
| 1
|
Hi guys. I need advice on how to approach this, preferably with some nuance. Quick backstory: In my last relationship I deep down honestly cannot say for certain that I wasn't cheated on, but there was a lot of questionable shit and she heavily overstepped my boundaries in a lot of ways with ex-FWBs, initially presented to me as "male friends." I was directly lied to a few times, and I gather that there were probably a handful of lies of omission. One thing that really bugged me is that she slept with one of them a day or two right before our planned first date after a couple of weeks of talking. So now I'm dipping my toes back into dating, and I matched with someone and we've been having pretty good conversation for the last few days. We will probably meet up soon, but I'm uncomfortable with the possibility that she could potentially have FWBs, as this is just how modern dating is - nothing specific about her, and honestly, the advice I am asking for is more for dating in general. I live and let live, there's no judgement, obviously. I don't need some lecture about how she's within her right to do so and that we haven't been on a date yet and aren't committed - I know full well that right now I'm just no one name-on-a-screen in an app and that we could just meet and it won't go anywhere. I already get all of this. I have the right to my boundaries and preferences though, and I don't want to commit to someone who actively has a FWB during the "courting" period and is "playing the boundary" - you know, because you don't usually just commit immediately after a week of talking and the first date, and there's that period where you can sleep with other people while it not really being cheating, right? I just want someone who is going into it with a clean slate like I am; no ghosts of the past, no current storied on/off FWB of the last 2 years. How do I even communicate this? I understand social tact and nuance, I can't just up and ask her "Hey, do you have any FWBs currently? When's the last time you slept with someone?" on a first date. I don't feel like that's something you really get to take stock of until you know each other better. I just don't want to go on multiple dates, commit, and then find out somewhere between date 2 and 3 that she slept with someone for "one last go at it." Does this make sense? How do I go about communicating this tactfully? &x200B; &x200B;
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Getting back into the dating world, need advice on communicating boundaries.
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1500zsm/getting_back_into_the_dating_world_need_advice_on/
|
SirSpudAlot
|
2019-01-18 07:54:52
| 1,547,798,092
| null |
['bumble']
| 0
|
ah88b7
| true
| null | 2
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/ah88b7/unsure_if_i_should_keep_it_going_or_just_end_it/
| 2
|
I 22 m met a girl, 21, on bumble almost two months ago, we hit it off at first even with both of us being awkward and it was my first time getting back into dating. The first two three dates was mostly having fun going out or movies and drinking and eventually got physical. Which I was happy about since it’s been awhile for me. We talked for almost two weeks straight then Christmas time things kinda slowed down and everything. But Lately I don’t feel myself attracted to her as I did at the start but we been seeing each other since, and she wants to push for “official” relationship, but I don’t feel comfortable with that. I told her it’s because she’s still in school and I’m planning on moving away, but she still insists and is convinced I’ll stay around for her. The whole thing makes me uncomfortable and I’m not really sure how to handle it. But for the last week maybe two I just been going along with it to see if feelings come back for her, but I don’t really feel it as much. And advice how to handle this? Should I just make it clear that I rather be friends and maybe cut contact for a short while? I’m worried she’s become really attached to me since she been pushing to make things official, meet her friends and parents and etc.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Unsure if I should keep it going or just end it and move on.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/ah88b7/unsure_if_i_should_keep_it_going_or_just_end_it/
|
Tycherosgata
|
2022-11-05 20:17:13
| 1,667,679,433
| null |
['online dating']
| 0
|
yn4y8k
| true
| null | 8
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/yn4y8k/men_are_freaked_out_about_my_past_is_it_really/
| 0
|
I’m 37 year old women with one teenage son. I was married 18 years previously until I found out ex had a whole other secret life/relationship but that’s another story. I’ve been single around 3 years and I’m so enjoying the freedom and my own company. I decided to dip into online dating just to chat and see where it leads. I’ve talked to a few guys and the running trend is that they are either freaked out I have a kid (which I did include on my profile) or while chatting are so shocked I have spent more than half my life with another man and have no prior experience of dating that I just get ghosted. I’ve tried different tactics and given little information as possible such as I was in a marriage for a long time but have been single for 3 years but eventually through the conversation more information is unraveled and I’m ghosted again. Is it really such a turn off to guys that a person has been in a long time marriage/relationship and has never really dated before?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Men are freaked out about my past, is it really that bad?
| null | 0.5
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/yn4y8k/men_are_freaked_out_about_my_past_is_it_really/
|
swmmww
|
2021-11-08 18:15:11
| 1,636,395,311
| null |
['swipe', 'online dating', 'dating apps', 'tinder']
| 0
|
qpjhy1
| true
| null | 24
| 0
|
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/qpjhy1/recently_single_thinking_about_this_approach_to/
| 0
|
Ok so I’m throwing this out there cuz I’m curious to hear folks’ thoughts on this plan. Not trying to brag but for context, I’m a petite woman [34F] who has generally had the experience of being regarded as attractive. I live in a smallish city (70,000 population). I would say it’s a pretty social town, with people being generally happy to chat and welcoming. Strong community vibes and you often “know” someone through some avenue or another (your roommate goes to the same gym, seen you on the mountain bike trails, regular at one of my favorite breweries, etc). I’ve used Tinder and other dating apps in the past (3+ years ago) with probably above average success. I’m really not worried about being able to meet new people as I can be quite chatty with people in spaces I feel comfortable. I am not, however, excited about the prospect of having inane conversations with dudes on apps that go nowhere, or are obnoxious, or overly sexual, or anything else really. God I dread the thought of sifting through profiles again. So here’s my plan: download Tinder (or whichever app) and make a profile. Let it simmer and don’t swipe on anyone. People will see my profile and possibly recognize me in public, making it clear that I’m single. This will increase the likelihood that they’ll strike up a conversation. I’m definitely not saying I’m achieving some kind of celebrity status and that every stranger will come flocking my way, I don’t have that big of an ego haha. But on the off chance that someone I’ve seen around sees it, and goes “huh, I know her from the place, she’s single?” it could lead to some productive results. Whatcha think, DOT?
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
Recently single: thinking about this approach to “online dating”
| null | 0.33
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/qpjhy1/recently_single_thinking_about_this_approach_to/
|
FrenchieMonkey
|
2022-01-16 12:56:36
| 1,642,337,796
| null |
['tinder']
| 0
|
s5bc9t
| true
| null | 10
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/s5bc9t/could_use_a_little_help_here_if_any_fellow/
| 0
|
Hello there, So here’s the thing, I kinda suck at choosing my own pictures for my . As a matter of fact I don’t have many pics that have been taken by other people than me, that’s why I have a lot of selfies and mirror pics. That being said, I get a hard time choosing them because, well, I’m not really confortable with my own image. So, a plea for help, if some of you guys could take a look at and help me choose the good ones. (Imgur post has been marked mature but it is not) I know there’s a lot but you can just scroll down and stop at the ones catching your eyes. And tell me which are these. Any judgement or advice is welcome, so don’t be afraid of being honest. Thanks a lot !
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Could use a little help here if any fellow Redditor have some time to waste
| null | 0.33
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/s5bc9t/could_use_a_little_help_here_if_any_fellow/
|
VastTurbulent2554
|
2024-08-25 07:10:02
| 1,724,569,802
| 0
|
['swiping', 'dating app', 'dating apps', 'plenty of fish', 'pof']
| 0
|
1f0qm2f
| true
|
Question ❓
| 2
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1f0qm2f/should_i_change_my_dating_apps_locations_to_new/
| 1
|
The bold text is the TLDR Where I live barely has any active Plenty of Fish (POF) users nearby. I get that POF isn’t the most popular dating app, but I’m still struggling on all the other apps if I use my actual location. So, I’m thinking of changing my POF location to the most populated city in the U.S. (New York, NY). It and all cities within a 200mi radius of it have a combined population of around 30 million people. That’s a lot of women lol I specify the radius of 200mi because this is the maximum radius for which POF will allow you to search for, like, and message women. I really need to use POF because women respond best to signs of effort, thoughtfulness, and initiative. I can also show this by cold approaching, but I cannot cold approach anywhere near 50 women per day. I specify the number (50) because paying for POF Premium allows you to send 50 First Contacts per day. And these First Contacts help show these signs. Because you only get one per day for free. To get the 50 per day that I'm interested in, you'd have to pay $120 for POF Premium for an entire year. And also because it takes more time, effort, and thoughtfulness to write a personalized message with an integrated compliment than just swiping right on her profile because you think she's pretty. These signs not only help me stand out from my competition, but women also look for them to weed out men who likely only want a hook-up. And this is why I have DISPROPORTIONATELY more success on POF than I do on any other dating app Because I can send so many of these messages straight to women’s DMs before matching. After researching, I found that about 27% of people are okay with a long-distance relationship for a very long time period. On the other hand, about 44% of people are okay with moving for love once the long-distance relationship has gone through a significant but relatively short amount of time (like 6 months or just enough to show that it’s serious). It's worth clarifying how this 44% wouldn’t keep it long-distance for more than this short time period (so not for very long like the aforementioned 27%). These are pretty good odds and I’ll have endless amounts of women to send First Contacts to. But do y’all think that this strategy will outperform cold approach? I have to pick either one of these strategies because each will likely take around an hour each day. I have a very busy schedule outside of dating. If I’m not going to fully utilize all my 50 daily First Contacts, I’d rather not pay for POF Premium. And the cold approaches would obviously only be done on weekdays since there’s not nearly as many people on-campus during weekends. I go to a huge university, obviously dominated by young people. And young people are statistically the most likely to be single. However, I oftentimes still must sift through women who already have boyfriends while I cold approach. Whether or not they're being honest or polite, about half of the time, girls respond to me by saying they have a boyfriend. But, even when dedicating an hour to cold approaching during the peak times of every weekday, I can still only average around 10 cold approaches per day. This number even includes my approaches outside that day’s hour when I just happen to walk by an attractive woman. Then, my university has extreme weather year-round (the summer heat is the worst but the winter cold isn't far from it). And lastly, cold approaching large numbers of women increases my chances of being labeled as a creep. This still, unfortunately, holds true despite me making my cold approaches extremely concise (so as to not annoy uninterested women by wasting time). So, I guess part of my question is: are cold approaches more effective than First Contacts, in general? And, if so, are they so effective so as to warrant going through all their hurdles, reducing the total number of women I can show high levels of effort, thoughtfulness, and initiative to each day, and forgo sending First Contacts altogether?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Should I change my dating apps' locations to New York, NY to find a girlfriend? Or just stick to cold approach?
| 1
| 0.67
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1f0qm2f/should_i_change_my_dating_apps_locations_to_new/
|
StrangeBell8605
|
2023-10-29 23:30:34
| 1,698,622,234
| 0
|
['online dating', 'dating app', 'dating apps', 'bumble', 'hinge']
| 0
|
17jfral
| true
|
Giving Advice 💌
| 1
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/17jfral/online_dating_is_just_insanely_difficult_for_guys/
| 1
|
Hey everyone I was wondering why getting likes and finding a date is so difficult on dating apps. With paying and some tricks I managed to get likes on Hinge and Bumble but still it is still a very big challenge to ask a girl out successfully. I knew that there are more women than me on dating apps but I didn’t really realize how it is to be woman on a dating app till I made a woman profile on Bumble. +50 likes in a day with a range of 12 km, I even didn’t know that there are so many guys in the neighborhood. And different kinds of guys, some of them with stronger features than me like being taller or more handsome or having better photo’s. Result: “Do not rely on dating apps as a guy Even if you are not confident you have way more chance IRL.”
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Online dating is just insanely difficult for guys
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/17jfral/online_dating_is_just_insanely_difficult_for_guys/
|
existentialspice
|
2023-07-14 21:26:31
| 1,689,369,991
| 0
|
['matches', 'bumble']
| 0
|
14zsp03
| false
|
I Need Advice 😩
| 1
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/14zsp03/attempting_to_be_friends_after_hanging_out_we/
| 1
|
Back on my birthday in early June, I decided to reach out to one of my expired Bumble matches. They left their IG handle in their bio and I figured it was worth a shot. The conversation went well and we moved over to Discord to continue talking (we're both gamers, at least to some extent). A day or so in, they told me that they were most likely moving back to their hometown across the country and that they didn't want to waste my time. They gave me a timeframe of a few months. At the time, I said it was alright and that we should live presently. Following that conversation, my match was super enthusiastic about talking to me and became super affectionate. Long story short, we hung out - the match was super affectionate the entire time and I thought it went very well - and then the day after it all sort of just... dissipated. I tried to keep the communication going, but the sudden less affectionate nature of our conversations was polarizing to me. I reached out for a check-in and they told me that they had their own stuff going on, it wasn’t a reflection of me, etc. I struggled a lot to believe these things (I'll probably mention them again, but I have pretty immense abandonment issues), but being semi-hopeful, I continued to message them. I was typically left on read until I'd start a new conversation a day later. A week after being left on read, the match reached out to tell me that they were going through a lot - almost getting evicted, having to move back home, not having a support system in the area, etc. Again, they reiterated that it wasn’t personal and that they really did enjoy hanging out and talking with me. I offered them friendship, suggesting that “things weren’t meant to happen” and the whole nine yards (I have BPD and looking back, definitely think I said this to get a response). I didn’t get much feedback about the latter, but the match said I had a friend in them as well and agreed that we could still talk and play games. But now I’m struggling with the friendship. I don’t know if it’s just my abandonment issues, or if it’s because I didn’t get any resolution, but I feel unsettled by the situation. I’m doing my best to maintain boundaries - not mentioning us hanging out (we kissed, that’s all, but still) and not prioritizing this person (they get off of work when I should be sleeping). I let my boundaries go last night and we got into a long late night conversation about our exes and how that impacted us. It didn’t make me hopeful per say, but I definitely enjoyed the conversation enough to forget my boundaries temporarily and that alarms me. They said a lot during our conversation that indicates they were most likely not looking for a relationship and are definitely not in the position to be in one, so I know I should just let it go, but letting go of quite literally anything is something I struggle with. I guess I’m wondering if anyone has been in a similar enough situation, and what did you do to alleviate the uneasiness? I don’t think it’s impossible to be friends, but telling myself that a relationship is unrealistic doesn’t necessarily make the friendship easier. We started talking a month and a half ago, is it possible it’s too soon to bounce back from them switching up communication on me? Any words mean a lot to me!
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
attempting to be friends after hanging out (we only kissed)
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/14zsp03/attempting_to_be_friends_after_hanging_out_we/
|
Mizu8088
|
2021-06-19 18:18:16
| 1,624,126,696
| null |
['matched', 'bumble']
| 0
|
o3mcvc
| true
| null | 3
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/o3mcvc/need_advice_navigating_a_fwbdating_situation/
| 2
|
So we matched on Bumble, and started to chat. I knew her previously, she was the ex of one of my friends (who I've now lost contact with) several years ago. We're both students still, so we caught up on text talking about classes and careers, etc. We decided to meetup for an activity, some snacks and drinks at a bar - It went really well, we really connected and talked a bunch. We got some brunch together a couple weeks after that. We both connected over cooking, so I invited her over to my place a few days later and offered to cook dinner. We ended up cooking the meal together, chatted and had a nice meal. After dinner, we ended up playing some games and watching a couple movies, but nothing really happened that night. I did notice she was leaning on me more during the movies (I was too nervous to make a move) so I thought that maybe there was some chance in the future. The movie we watched happened to be a series, and we wanted to watch the next ones together, so I invited her over again a few days later to do so. I got the courage to finally put my arm around her, and she was receptive to it, and adjusted to my arms. Later she tilted her head to look up at me, and I took that as the sign to kiss her. We started making out, and we got a little touchy-feely, ending up with her shirt off. I noticed she was a little hesitant maybe, so before we went any further I asked her if she wanted to stop, and she agreed. We had a conversation about our expectations for this, and she told me she really only saw this as a friend-thing. I was a little disappointed as I saw it as more dates, but after getting to know her, I really enjoyed spending time with her and didn't want to lose that so I accepted that. A few days later, we grabbed some food and boba together. We ended up back at my place to play some games. After we finished, we chatted on the couch and somehow we ended up with my arm around her cuddling. She felt a little sleepy so she wrapped herself in my throw blanket and was napping with her head on my lap, and I was playing/caressing her hair for a bit. She got up a little later, and suddenly straddled me. We ended up making out again and grabbing each other, before we kinda paused. We both asked, "what are we doing?", before she pointed in the direction of my bed, I picked her up and we had sex. We showered after, and since she lives at home she had to leave and couldn't stay. I walked her down to her car, gave her a hug and she left. After she left she texted me later that night that she enjoyed it and would be down to do it again. A couple days later we planned to bake things together. After baking and having a small meal together, we felt sleepy from the food and she offered to cuddle for a little bit on my bed. I obliged, and we just spent an hour cuddling. Of course it later turned into more sex, and again we showered and she left. Since then, we've been texting more about what we really want with this, and while we both enjoy the sex, we both have some concerns about a relationship. I'm graduating soon, and haven't really figured out what I'm gonna do. My potential careers might take me somewhere else in the US or even overseas, while she's been in and out of relationships for a while now and wants a break. I also feel that I kinda need to get myself 100% sorted first, before starting anything. But honestly I'm lonely, and my last relationship was almost two years ago. Living alone the past two years through quarantine and COVID has definitely made me lonely, horny, and desperate for any human connections. I can't help think that this is a best of both worlds thing, where I get to have sex and get a cool friend Problem is: I really like her. We have a lot in common, she's sweet, funny, and an overall cool person that I'd really like to get to know seriously. I know that she's against getting in a relationship again, so I've been playing down my feelings and have accepted being FWBs. I'm afraid that if I truly tell her how I feel, I ruin the relationship, I lose the sex, the friend, and maybe we stop talking. Every guide on FWBs I've seen on the internet says not to start with someone you have feelings for, and I do. But I truly value our relationship over anything else, and if she absolutely does not want a relationship and wants to stay friends (with or without sex) I have no problem with that. I have a problem with the label FWB, I typically see them as acquaintances who prioritize the sex, and not the friendship. I don't see this situation as a booty-call, it's someone I genuinely enjoy spending time with, and the sex/making out/cuddling, is just a bonus. Is it possible for a man and woman to have sex as platonic (-- may not be the right word) friends, without any romantic or emotional meaning? Do I need to call the intimate/sexual part of the relationship off in an attempt to remain as platonic as possible? I know that this whole situation may not make sense for you, but any advice would be helpful. I feel totally lost, and I just don't want for any of us to get hurt.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Need advice navigating a FWB/dating situation
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/o3mcvc/need_advice_navigating_a_fwbdating_situation/
|
vote_yes_421
|
2024-06-10 11:16:19
| 1,718,018,179
| 0
|
['matched', 'hinge']
| 0
|
1dcj0vh
| true
| null | 7
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/1dcj0vh/seeking_closure_with_person_who_ghosted_me_by/
| 1
|
Hey, Obviously the title of this post sounds like a major red flag, hear me out. I had a date with that girl, (we're both late 20s) and it seemed like it matched, at the end of the date she tells me she had a great time and she wants to see me again, so the next day I sent her a message on Hinge asking if she wants to give me her number, no answer, I didn't send anything else as I didn't want to pressure her, then 4 days later she unmatches me. Obviously this isn't the first time it happens to me, but 80% of the time it's mutual or at least the person just tells you "hey, sorry but no" which is 100% fine, but the fact that she literally just lied then ghosted has been affecting me more than expected and I've been thinking about it a lot the past few days, I just want closure I guess? I know I'm entering weirdo territory here, but I litteraly just searched her name and her job title in the LinkedIn search bar and she was in the top 3, and so I was thinking about just sending her a message among the lines of "I had a great time during our date, but I get it, it's fine and those things happen, I just wished you told me instead of ghosting/deleting me, but I still I wish you to be happy, goodbye" Is this stalker behaviour, is this weird? Should I shove the emotions deep down and turn the page? Or is this potentially ok ? I'm painfully aware I'm still a bit sensitive after what happened, hence the need to ask other human beings if i'm crazy or not
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Seeking closure with person who ghosted me by sending her a message on LinkedIn?
| 1
| 0.33
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1dcj0vh/seeking_closure_with_person_who_ghosted_me_by/
|
RecordingPlayful8905
|
2024-06-05 00:39:49
| 1,717,547,989
| 0
|
['dating app', 'dating apps']
| 0
|
1d8d0wi
| true
|
Question ❓
| 4
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1d8d0wi/if_i_am_ghosted_does_that_really_mean_its_over/
| 1
|
I must be really new to this whole dating in 2024 thing because apparently, it's okay if someone ghosts you because that doesn't necessarily mean that it's over. But what if they block you from the dating app? Does that mean it's over? From what people who often use dating apps are telling me this is "normal" and that he could always come back to chat with you especially if he has your phone number. I'm not sure. What are your thoughts?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
If I am ghosted, does that really mean it's over?
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1d8d0wi/if_i_am_ghosted_does_that_really_mean_its_over/
|
Wise_Homework2292
|
2024-01-22 03:48:21
| 1,705,895,301
| 0
|
['matched', 'dating app']
| 0
|
19cmgko
| true
|
Question ❓
| 2
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/19cmgko/phone_number_after_date/
| 1
|
I matched with a lady on a dating app two weeks ago and just met up for a date yesterday which she give me a hug at the very beginning, at the end of the date of two hours I asked if I could get her number and she said "I think I'll stay on the app." When she was leaving, she didn't give me a hug like she did when we first saw each other. Does that mean she not interested?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Phone Number After Date
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/19cmgko/phone_number_after_date/
|
ykwis15
|
2023-02-08 00:35:20
| 1,675,816,520
| null |
['hinge']
| 0
|
10wi8zs
| true
| null | 5
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/10wi8zs/my_29m_first_date_with_someone_off_hinge_25f/
| 1
|
First date after recently getting out of a 4 year relationship. Any last second advice to calm my nerves?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
My [29M] first date with someone off Hinge [25F] coming up in an hour. First date after recently getting out of a 4 year relationship. Any last second advice?
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/10wi8zs/my_29m_first_date_with_someone_off_hinge_25f/
|
AllUpInMyButt
|
2016-03-11 16:56:50
| 1,457,715,410
| 0
|
['dating sites']
| 0
|
49zmf7
| null | null | 123
| null |
/r/AskMen/comments/49zmf7/what_personality_typestraits_doesnt_mesh_well/
| 67
|
One for me is, someone who always has to be doing something, always has something planned. I love the non-obligation of time off, and prefer to not have things so regimented. I don't want to 'not' do anything all the time, but I find that when on dating sites, I don't swipe "yes" on those with all "active" pictures. Man, sometimes chillin is nice!
|
AskMen
|
t5_2s30g
|
What personality type(s)/trait(s) doesn't mesh well with you?
| 67
| null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/49zmf7/what_personality_typestraits_doesnt_mesh_well/
|
avalava123
|
2021-08-25 16:56:47
| 1,629,910,607
| null | null | 0
|
pbfcan
| true
| null | 17
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/pbfcan/what_should_women_ask_on_first_dates/
| 9
|
Following another post (sorry can't link it, from mobile) I am starting to wonder what women should ask on first dates? I tend to ask open ended questions and then see how to conversation goes, for example "do you have anything fun planned you are looking forward to?" (if the guy is smart and cheeky enough can always reply with "our second date!" which is an automatic win :D)
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
What should women ask on first dates?
| null | 0.76
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/pbfcan/what_should_women_ask_on_first_dates/
|
beebeesandy
|
2021-12-20 18:37:23
| 1,640,025,443
| null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0
|
rktyd8
| true
| null | 21
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/rktyd8/tinder_guy_cried_on_my_shoulder_when_i_said_he/
| 0
|
I (46F single mom) have been a few dates with a guy(41M) matched in tinder since this November . We texted and talked in phone every day. Things seemed going well but I realised lately that he was not my style bc I always want a strong guy can make decisions but he always asked my opinions. I still don't know if he was so respect me or he was not decisive enough. He seemed also a bit bored and he couldn't make any weekend plan 🙄 Also, he is not tall enough🤦🏻♀️ He started from very beginning to say he loved me forever, etc. He included me in future plan as well. He also wanted me to move into his new house that he would receive in coming March. I just don't want to waste his and my time bc i am not really into him, so i told him we had to stop after a dinner date yesterday. He was very upset and even cried on my shoulder. Tbh, i could feel he really like or love me in his eyes when he looked at me. And i knew he was genuine to me. But i just still understand why a guy would fall in love with a woman so easy. It seems impossible to me. When i asked him this question, he just replied me he knew what he wanted and i am his dream girl. I was thinking of him all day today and also wonder if I could really find a man better than him. Am I doing right? Is it just my fantasy to find a perfect guy? Any idea, ?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Tinder guy cried on my shoulder when I said he was not my style and our relationship should be an end.
| null | 0.47
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/rktyd8/tinder_guy_cried_on_my_shoulder_when_i_said_he/
|
Big_fan_of_curry
|
2023-12-04 23:45:01
| 1,701,733,501
| 0
| null | 0
|
18axzze
| true
| null | 53
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/18axzze/do_you_or_have_you_ever_met_up_for_sex_without/
| 11
|
Maybe I'm just paranoid but the amount of opportuniites I've had over the last 10-12 years of having sex via meeting someone over an app is insane. All of which I chickened out on. All I can think about is, "what if this is a setup?" "what if i get there and her bf is there and it's a scam to mug me?" and shit like that do people really just go fuck after matching on an app and idk, nothing bad happens lol?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
Do you or have you ever met up for sex without meeting in person first?
| 11
| 0.74
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/18axzze/do_you_or_have_you_ever_met_up_for_sex_without/
|
Appropriate_Risk_899
|
2022-08-12 19:28:29
| 1,660,332,509
| null |
['matches', 'online dating', 'hinge']
| 0
|
wmtpxw
| true
| null | 10
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/wmtpxw/decided_to_talk_to_only_one_person_at_a_time_and/
| 3
|
I took a 2-3month break from online dating. Before then I was just talking to whoever would match with me. As a guy its 50/50 or lower chance that a match will to a date. And first dates are a hit or miss. So, like many, I thought it was fine to go on a couple dates with other people. I found that real exhausting for me personally. Im introverted and it really drained my energy. During the break I refocused on some goals/priorities. In an attempt to not let dating take over my life again and to save myself from social burn out I decided to only chat with one person at a time on the apps. I am totally open to meet people in person. On Hinge I'm starting to get a surprising amount of likes. I started talking to someone and she had to reschedule our third date, because she forgot about plans she made a friend a while ago. Then has been taking 24hr+ to respond at times. We do have a 3rd date planned. But the lack of communication makes me feel like I am reliving past situations. Now that I am back into dating it is difficult for me to see signs that could be a lack of interest and not talk to others. The reality is I dont have the time to be going on dates with multiple people. I knew this issue would pop up. Where Id wonder if I'm "wasting my time" on someone. Its like if I feel like someone isnt that interested or I have a concern that Im unsure about I kind of want to just figure that out asap or I'm just waiting for things to unfold for one person when I have other matches. So lack of patience sure. But maybe allowing myself to talk to max two people might help me here. However I have two friends who thought the idea of talking to more then one women at once was being a "player" and rude. But I also think seeing multiple hurt my ability to really get to know someone. So its that awkwardness of not being sure about a current person, but also not sure if I should start talking to someone else and then end up having to juggle two people. So not sure if I need to work on my patience
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Decided to talk to only one person at a time and its harder then I thought. 29m
| null | 0.72
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/wmtpxw/decided_to_talk_to_only_one_person_at_a_time_and/
|
BastilaHasFallen
|
2021-01-15 09:38:28
| 1,610,703,508
| null |
['dating apps']
| 0
|
kxrapi
| true
|
Tinder/Online Dating
| 11
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/kxrapi/what_are_your_experiences_on_dating_apps/
| 3
|
I'm just curious to see the good VS bad on said apps. I don't have a whole lot experience on them myself, but every time I seem to match with a guy he's just more interested in having sex with me (which I am not in it for). Every time I match with a girl (I'm bi) she's either trying to find someone for a threesome with her boyfriend, or they're dead end conversations.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
What Are Your Experiences On Dating Apps?
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/kxrapi/what_are_your_experiences_on_dating_apps/
|
wanttohearyourview
|
2021-03-23 23:49:40
| 1,616,543,380
| null |
['online dating']
| 2
|
mbsatw
| true
| null | 485
| 0
|
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/mbsatw/it_took_me_a_year_to_get_the_courage_to_ask_a_guy/
| 2,657
|
I (36F) got denied. He said he’s seeing someone. I feel embarrassed but I’m actually proud of myself for putting myself out there. I don’t do online dating, I suffered a bad break up a year ago and had a terrible bout of depression during lockdown. But the fact that I did this shows me I’m making a shift. I still plan on going to the gym, so no doubt I will feel a bit silly if I see him!
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
It took me a year to get the courage to ask a guy out at the gym, and last night I finally did it...
| null | 0.98
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/mbsatw/it_took_me_a_year_to_get_the_courage_to_ask_a_guy/
|
Ice-Lake
|
2021-03-23 08:38:43
| 1,616,488,723
| null | null | 0
|
mba6g8
| true
| null | 33
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/mba6g8/what_are_the_best_dating_apps_for_someone_looking/
| 16
|
I'm 26, male. Tinder sucks, Bumble sucks, hinge sucks, coffee meets bagel sucks, OKCupid sucks... I get practically 0 matches, and 0 likes, and on some I literally do have 0 likes... And I have used them for a long time. Unless it's me, which I don't think it is, since people have told I'm quite good-looking (I'd say I'm about average-looking), and my photos are apparantly okay according to girls I know, and so is my bio...
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
What are the best dating apps for someone looking for a serious relationship?
| null | 0.94
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/mba6g8/what_are_the_best_dating_apps_for_someone_looking/
|
May_December279
|
2021-03-02 23:50:17
| 1,614,729,017
| null |
['OLD']
| 0
|
lwfz1d
| true
| null | 149
| 0
|
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/lwfz1d/when_is_it_appropriate_to_express_sexual/
| 78
|
I’m 35F and have never had sexual intercourse. My hope is to change that before I turn 40. I don’t want to have intercourse unless I’m in a committed relationship but completely understand that most men are going to require that that committed relationship includes sexual activity. I have to say that in the past when I’ve expressed that I’m still a virgin it’s been somewhat fetishized. It didn’t make me thaaaat uncomfortable but it was a little weird. (Now that I think about it I didn’t like those guys at all so that explains part of it). Im not opposed to outercourse and fellatio before a committed relationship. I may be dipping my toe in OLD so I don’t want to waste mine or anyone else’s time.
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
When is it appropriate to express sexual inexperience?
| null | 0.91
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/lwfz1d/when_is_it_appropriate_to_express_sexual/
|
PurpleSlug95
|
2015-05-25 03:29:16
| 1,432,524,556
| 0
|
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0
|
375uxj
| null | null | 1
| null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/375uxj/is_this_guy_interested_in_me_if_so_help/
| 1
|
A day before this quarter of college started, I matched with this guy on tinder. After a week into the quarter me and the guy made some pretty intense eye contact when we realized we were in the same class as we walked in. The next class after that one and every other time we had class he started sitting next to me, some days other people would sit next to me and he wouldn't be able to sit next to me but whenever he could he would sit there and eventually it became like his official spot. But he never talked to me or anyone though. During week 8 we spoke for the first time ever, because I asked a question, then we talked for the remaining 15 minutes of class. We even shook hands and introduced ourselves and there was a lot of smiling. anyway it felt like more than small talk and we talked about our hometowns, and goals in college, and he asked me a lot of questions like he wanted to get to know me, like when I said I was switching my major to environmental engineering he asked me like what I wanted to do and stuff, and we talked about lame little jobs, like how he had a job selling hot dogs, we both kinda laughed about and admitted that we were lazy, and bonded over how we didn't really understand anything in our programming class, he told me a lot about himself like how he was in a frat, and how his family was full of doctors and how his mom had job connections for him, I mean he wasn't bragging he was just saying how it helps to know the right people , and I kinda talked about how my family was all non professionals and he said it was really cool that I was setting up my own future on my own, so idk that comment seemed super complimenty to me, it felt like we actually got to know eachother a little.and he mentioned he was shy and didn't know anyone in class, and I said I was too and that I only talked to my 2 friends in that class, that I called my little crew( that weren't there that day), and then he said he'd be my crew for when they weren't there lol, so anyway this guy seems like a really nice guy. And before I asked him for help I pretty much kept wanting to talk to him this whole fucking quarter but I never did because I was so nervous lol, but I finally did and I'm so proud of myself. Neither of us has acknowledged the tinder thing. But anyway I'm thinking he might be interested but was always to shy to talk to me, because he seemed pretty eager to talk to me once we finally started talking, I mean so was I though lol. But yeah why would you sit next to a girl you matched in tinder with but never talk to her. I know he got out of a long term relationship a couple months ago so maybe his social skills with women' he's interested in are a bit rusty? Also we're both currently engineering students. He seems like a super nice guy and I really want to get to know him, I think he's interested and he wasn't being overly flirty like he just wants to get in my pants. Also he kept offering to help me with the labs once he figures out how to do them lol. Anyway if he is interested in me I feel like I'll have to do all the work because he might be too shy, so how do I go about asking him on a date and what not. There's only like 3 weeks left of school!
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Is this guy interested in me, if so help!
| 1
| null |
http://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/375uxj/is_this_guy_interested_in_me_if_so_help/
|
Raine-n-Kitties
|
2021-02-04 02:03:19
| 1,612,404,199
| null |
['dating app', 'dating platform']
| 0
|
lc4pkk
| true
| null | 1
| 0
|
/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/lc4pkk/how_can_i_make_a_simple_dating_app/
| 0
|
I’m single and want to date. I know of some groups of people that are like minded so I’m trying to bring them together. I think I’m looking for some kind of online program to bring us all together and to get to know each other. Or some kind of dating platform. I have the email addresses but I need the platform to bring the singles together to give a bio and answer some questions. Anyone have any ideas? (Sorry if this is confusing. It’s hard to explain so please ask questions if clarification is needed.)
|
TwoXChromosomes
|
t5_2r2jt
|
How can I make a simple dating app?
| null | 0.3
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/lc4pkk/how_can_i_make_a_simple_dating_app/
|
Stella_Jane83
|
2022-02-13 14:24:26
| 1,644,762,266
| null | null | 0
|
srjq44
| true
| null | 9
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/srjq44/new_to_old/
| 2
|
I (38F) made my first ever OLD profile last night. I had a couple of nice chats before bed. This morning I wake up to 30 "likes". It's flattering but it's overwhelming. Do I need to make a decision on those guys right away? I'm on FB dating. Is there a way to put an age range in my profile other than putting on the main description? Also, why doesn't OLD have a "maybe" button. If I click "like" on every guy I'm maybe about I would be chatting with 20 dudes. I can't handle that.
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
New to OLD
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/srjq44/new_to_old/
|
sparklewithkindness
|
2024-07-11 20:21:51
| 1,720,729,311
| 0
|
['online dating', 'dating site']
| 0
|
1e0ynqv
| true
| null | 13
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/1e0ynqv/dating_after_24_years_with_my_ex_husband/
| 2
|
I'm so confused at the moment. My husband and I broke up 8 months ago, he cheated on me several times over the course of our 22 year marriage and was controlling. I discovered from a friend that he had joined a dating site under a different name before we had officially split up. As a knee jerk response I also joined a dating site and got a lot of attention. At 54 I'd never used online dating and was very nervous. Got chatting with a lovely guy and chat became very flirty and then sexual talk. All very new to me. We met and got on and have been together almost 6 months. Just recently I feel like he's becoming less interested and I am getting paranoid about him possibly cheating. Most communication is via WhatsApp and he gives short responses now, no real effort to make plans but when we do get together he acts like everything is OK. I can't bear not knowing when I'll see him next and I've become obsessed with checking for messages. Is dating after many years with the same person always this hard? Maybe I've got into something too quickly. How do I chill out about it or is it reasonable to expect both parties to make effort? Feel like I'm going a bit crazy tbhx
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Dating after 24 years with my ex husband
| 2
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1e0ynqv/dating_after_24_years_with_my_ex_husband/
|
cmariedcoffee
|
2021-08-13 23:08:41
| 1,628,896,121
| null |
['tinder']
| 0
|
p3wggy
| true
| null | 15
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/p3wggy/boyfriend_spending_time_with_a_girl_from_tinder/
| 2
|
My boyfriend and I are both 25 and we met on tinder. We have been together for 1 year. One of his close friends is a girl. He told me when we first got together he had no romantic interest in her. He goes on trips with the girl and his father/family to golf or fish. He will invite me but I usually have a conflict. And some of the things they do aren't really my interests, although I'd go to be with my bf if I could. I didn't have an issue with this but then I found out they met on tinder and now it bothers me a little bit. Does anyone else think this is weird? Or I am just being dramatic?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Boyfriend spending time with a girl from tinder?
| null | 0.67
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/p3wggy/boyfriend_spending_time_with_a_girl_from_tinder/
|
ooblecccck
|
2024-04-25 01:08:13
| 1,714,007,293
| 0
|
['matches', 'dating apps', 'hinge']
| 0
|
1ccf42t
| true
| null | 3
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/1ccf42t/how_do_you_go_about_approaching_meeting_someone/
| 1
|
I (24m) recently deleted my Hinge account after some exasperation, lack of matches, and really the fact it didn’t make me feel positive about myself. Don’t get me wrong, I had a fair amount of dates and was probably slightly more successful than the average guy but I really grew to dislike the whole concept of dating apps while I was on it. I’m not looking to meet people in person but am having a really hard time. I have an extensive social circle but keep striking out here since most of the girls I come across have boyfriends if I’m interested in them or aren’t interested in me back. Furthermore, I’ve been active in my hobbies like climbing, cycling, etc. but it seems so awkward to approach a girl in these environments. I always hear don’t approach a woman in public unless she’s giving you obvious signs but I’m horrible at reading those. Even at coffee shops someone will catch my eye but part of me doesn’t want to be the cringey guy who appears out of nowhere and gives her my number. Basically, I’ve been looking for opportunities to meet women more irl but it seems like there really aren’t any in this modern age. I don’t want to get back on the dating apps but the alternative might be dating life grinding to a full stop. How do I go about connecting with someone irl without being that guy who constantly approaches random women to give their number out? All of my friends seem to have found their SO’s through the apps or from college and no girl has ever approached me so I feel like I’m in uncharted territory. Maybe it’s about just embracing the cold open approach but that’s really not my style.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How do you go about approaching/ meeting someone IRL as someone in their mid-20s??
| 1
| 0.5
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1ccf42t/how_do_you_go_about_approaching_meeting_someone/
|
Beginning_Weekend_25
|
2024-08-15 17:52:09
| 1,723,744,329
| 0
|
['dating apps']
| 0
|
1et1ncn
| true
| null | 7
| 0
|
/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/1et1ncn/i_need_help_dealing_with_a_phase_of_extreme/
| 0
|
Hello. I'm a 25 year old female. I'm going through a phase right now and I would really like some help. I was in a very fulfilling relationship with someone who was much older than me, but was everything and more than I had imagined in a partner; a perfect gentleman and a 10/10 in bed. However, my stupid ass took some of his comments the wrong way, and I ended up breaking up with him. I know in my heart it wasn't meant to last that long, but I was/am still sad about it. After the breakup, it was like something inside me opened and I started watching porn all the time, doom scrolling through all the dating apps, even creepy staring at hot guys on the subway 😭 but I didn't actually do anything, until last month I took a small trip to Nevada, and while there I got a massage. The male masseuse ended up touching me inappropriately, more than once and in more than one spot. And while I know how fucked up it is, I enjoyed what he did. I feel very guilty about this, because I was actually scared but I didn't stop him and I think he knew what was going on. I don't remember the name of the exact place, but now I wish I had reported him or done something more about it :( When I came back, it was like a demon took over. The masseuse abusing the situation led me to want to put myself in situations where I would feel taken advantage of again. I started making posts here on Reddit and also let any guy pick me up at the bar. I always feinged being too intoxicated and they would just take me home and I would let them, and even though I knew I was only tipsy, they didn't. I didn't even think about the implications of that, I just wanted to have sex and the urge was (is) incredibly blinding. I even let an Uber guy basically kidnap me to his house. And I always set up meetings with randos from Reddit asking for just a hang out fully knowing that they will convince me to sleep with them and I'll let them. Before the breakup, I had only slept with a couple of guys, but in the past few weeks, I've had sex with different men even twice a day. I don't even know what my body count is now. It doesn't help that it is incredibly easy to find a hookup in NYC. And I wish I could say that it makes me happy but it doesn't. The anticipation of meeting someone knew is strong and very exciting, but once everything is done and over with, I just feel awkward and disgusted with the guy next to me. And I never want to see any of them again so it just turns into this string or new guy after new guy and me feeling that excitement and then only disgust. But I just keep doing it. It's gotten to the point that the only thing I think about is sex with a new person. And every time I've done it, I ask for more and more violence. I'm afraid that if I continue doing this, I will put myself in a legitimately dangerous situation that I have no control over. I'm not eating well, I've stopped working out, and the only thing I'm basically keeping up with is work simply because i have to be there. I don't know how to deal with everything. I don't find promiscuity to be a bad thing. Were it not for how I'm going about it, I would be ok with enjoying having so muc sex. But this feels different from that. It's almost a craving that I've been waking up with every day. I don't want to feel it anymore. I still miss my ex and idk if I should reach out, but the thought of having sex with one person only makes me borderline depressed. Is this normal? Am I manic? I don't even know what the actual point of this is. I don't have anyone to talk to about this kind of stuff and my head is so convoluted that I'm not sure if this is me confessing or asking for help or what. I don't know. ,
|
TwoXChromosomes
|
t5_2r2jt
|
I need help dealing with a phase of extreme promiscuity
| 0
| 0.31
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/1et1ncn/i_need_help_dealing_with_a_phase_of_extreme/
|
ask_nae
|
2023-10-26 02:46:27
| 1,698,288,387
| 0
|
['swiping', 'tinder']
| 0
|
17gmj79
| true
| null | 1
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/17gmj79/not_dating_but_i_now_realize_where_my_issues_stem/
| 1
|
Ever since I was a teenage girl and aware of my own looks, and the comments of others I begun to be teased by boys and became avoidant anxious. I was insecure and didn’t know how to manage my body and facial insecurities. I struggled with asserting myself against people that were harmful to my mental health and I was very afraid of approaching guys just to socialize, I never got over that fear so after high school my first sexual experience at 22 was traumatic we did it one time and I cut him off he thought I was naive enough to allow him to have sex with me while he was engaged this left me so traumatized and in fear I didn’t want to speak or interact anymore and shut down it wasn’t until age 25 I went on tinder mindlessly swiping (a total waste of time and after years of social isolation) no boundaries and a negative inner voice I allowed myself to have a sexual experience with a stranger it was lonely and more traumatic then I left him and told myself no more sex. Then I was sexually assaulted again when a man approached me at the gas station we texted back and forth and I wasn’t interested tbh but the way I was raised I was told all men that show me any ounce of attention want sex so I should play the “chase” game until I give in which hasn’t been a good strategy.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Not dating but I now realize where my issues stem from with the guys
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17gmj79/not_dating_but_i_now_realize_where_my_issues_stem/
|
anshgambhir01
|
2022-03-07 18:04:15
| 1,646,676,255
| null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0
|
t8v9pu
| true
| null | 10
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/t8v9pu/first_girl_on_tinder_i_clicked_with_need_some_help/
| 1
|
Hi I am a 21 year old average looking dude who is on the heavier side. There is this girl I got matched with. We had a very good chat and share similar sense of humour but the problem with me is that I am unable to take things forward with her. I know how to make her laugh but dont know how to ask her out as I want a casual relationship or something like fwb.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
FIRST GIRL ON TINDER I CLICKED WITH. NEED SOME HELP!
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/t8v9pu/first_girl_on_tinder_i_clicked_with_need_some_help/
|
starriafly
|
2024-01-10 20:37:36
| 1,704,919,056
| 0
|
['dating app', 'hinge']
| 0
|
193igrr
| true
| null | 3
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/193igrr/his_followingfollower_count_increases/
| 1
|
I’ve (F22) met a guy (M23) on Hinge. We’ve been talking to each other for weeks now and haven’t met yet because he travelled to a different country for a vacation but we’re planning to meet after he comes back. We’ve expressed our interest towards each other and we’ve also been flirting a lot. However, I’ve noticed that whenever I check on his profile on instagram, his following/follower count increases and I know you guys might say that I’m crazy for even analyzing this knowing we’re not yet official, but I really like him and I want us to work out. Can this probably mean that he’s still using the dating app and entertaining other girls and following each other on ig? If yes, what can I do to avoid having this anxious feeling? It just sucks because he’s the only guy I’m entertaining right now and yes, I’m being loyal in the talking stage so please don’t roast me for that. He’s probably entertaining other girls but I don’t really know because he has expressed his interest a lot. What can I do to ‘stand on business’ and not care about this matter too much?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
his following/follower count increases
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/193igrr/his_followingfollower_count_increases/
|
Key_Resist7635
|
2024-08-16 07:01:02
| 1,723,791,662
| 0
|
['matched', 'hinge']
| 0
|
1eti8y2
| true
|
I Need Advice 😩
| 4
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1eti8y2/need_advice_on_a_few_fears_early_into_my/
| 1
|
Hi all. I (24 turning 25 in a couple of days M) recently got into a relationship with my amazing girlfriend (22 F). We matched on Hinge and we both felt as though we had a really strong connection from the jump (and we still do). We share the same value system, we both make each other laugh, we both enjoy each other's company, we both are attracted to one another, and we both already feel as though we have a long future together. Granted I understand the issues and problems with jumping head first into a relationship, but I really feels as though she is the one for me. Before I even go any further, I have talked to women in the past, but never fully got into a RELATIONSHIP relationship. Nothing as serious as this. I have kinda spoken to her about one of the two issues that I am getting ready to detail to you all. The first fear--and the one that I have talked to her about--is that I have is that of the distance in which we live currently. We live about an hour and a half from one another. I have always felt as though that the drive is worth is because we both love one another, but this bleeds over into a more specific issue--our future living situation. I am not trying to drastically think ahead years into the future, but this concerns me greatly. I adore my family and do not want to move TOO far away from them. 30-45 minutes from them? Not a problem. And hour? Not entirely great but doable. An hour and a half or more? A bit of a concern for me. Without entirely assuming, I know for a fact that my girlfriend adores her family as well and probably wouldn't be too comfortable moving an hour and a half away from them. Granted I know that things change, job situations force movement, and so on. However I fear that a compromise (like moving to a city that's 30-45 minutes away from our respective families) might not be fully agreed upon, and that is pretty scary to me. Her family owns land and has houses on said land that would be for rent, if say for example finding our own housing isn't ideal. We want to be engaged and married before moving in, just our own personal beliefs. But that also scares me because I don't necessarily want to be owing rent to my potential mother-in-law, as much as I like her and love my girlfriend. Again I know that this is a down-the-road concern, but it's something that I do greatly fear might cause unwanted ripples in this relationship. The second fear that I have--which I have not talked to her about to this point--pertains to how fast this relationship is going. I think we are definitely going faster than most relationships, plain and simple. We have been together for 3 weeks, going on 4. I have already met her mother and we are spending nearly every day together in some compacity--whether it be some days making the drive to our respective cities/homes or on say Discord, watching TV Shows, Movies, and playing games with one another. I really do enjoy spending all of this time with her, do not get me wrong However, I feel as though I am not spending enough time with my friends or family members. I mean we call each other every night, regardless if we are spending the day together, to fall asleep on the phone together. Granted, time does have to be balanced out and I just feel as though that I am not having enough time to spend with others and I am just unsure of how to tell her that I would like to be able to do my own things at times. It is not as if she is completely controlling anything that I do. For example, yesterday I told her that my friends were thinking about hopping on the PC and wanted to play a few games with me and I told them that I would because I have not been able to play with them in a bit (did not tell her that last part simply because I forgot to), and she said that she was good and that she had made some plans with her best friend and we did what we did without anyone getting hurt or upset (at least to my knowledge, and my girlfriend is EXTREMELY vocal about any and all emotions that she feels). It is just that I want to be able to have a balance between my girlfriend, my friends, and my family without one of those three getting upset or annoyed or angry with me because I am not spending enough time with them. I would greatly appreciate any advice any of you might have with this kind of thing. Ultimately, I do have extremely strong feelings for my girlfriend and I want to be able to work out any and everything that might cross our paths. Additionally, I know for a fact that the issue and fear of job and housing situation(s) are down the road and I know that I am probably making a mountain out of a molehill. I just desperately do not want this relationship that I have with her to falter because of any future financial issues (job and housing included), nor do I want it to falter because she might take me wanting to spend more time with my friends and family the wrong way. Maybe I am just feeling butterflies or jitters or something like that because it is early in the relationship and we are crazy for one another. I've heard the term "honeymoon phase" be thrown around me a bit and even if we are in that phase, I know for sure that I do not want any of these problems or fears that I have to be unresolved and not talked about. I will mention to her about my second fear that I have, but I want to do it after my birthday that is in a couple of days so that does not cause any problems with that. Any and all advice is much appreciated, even if it is to tell me that I need to just relax and enjoy these moments. I have indeed been told that before once before writing this post. Please help a brother out Love you all!
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Need Advice on a Few Fears Early Into My Relationship (semi-TDLR)
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1eti8y2/need_advice_on_a_few_fears_early_into_my/
|
Aliskrti
|
2024-08-29 12:47:57
| 1,724,935,677
| 0
|
['hinge']
| 0
|
1f41ivn
| true
|
Question ❓
| 2
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1f41ivn/going_smoothly_with_girl_but_is_hesitant_to_make/
| 1
|
(20M) met this girl on hinge about a month and a half ago. Since then, we've had a really good "dating" life. Since meeting we've gone out at least once a week, she's come over my house and met my parents, and I've met some of her family as well. We text often, and we both initiate things (making plans, starting convos, intimacy). Every once in a while I'll propose the idea of her being my girlfriend. When I do this, she never really gives me a straight answer about it. The explanation she gave me was that she just takes a while to get comfortable and be official. Yesterday I brought it up again, just to check in on how she's feeling and if she's happy with the pace that we're going at. She's still hesitant. I asked her, "are you leaning towards a yes or a no?" And she replied, "what do you think? I keep agreeing to go out with you." Implying that she likes me and that she's leaning towards yes, but it's not a definite. So I just have some questions. Is this normal for many girls? How long do girls usually take to want to make things official? Am I going too fast or being too pushy when asking her about this? Am I wasting my time? Basically, I just want to see if this is going in the right direction/if it's totally normal. FYI I am new to the dating game and I'm happy to answer any clarifying questions, thanks!
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Going smoothly with girl but is hesitant to make things official
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1f41ivn/going_smoothly_with_girl_but_is_hesitant_to_make/
|
gunghogary
|
2020-02-25 04:21:06
| 1,582,604,466
| null |
['dating app']
| 0
|
f94ii2
| true
| null | 3
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/f94ii2/dating_app_age_filters/
| 1
|
I’m not the best at these apps, but I have a question that I can’t figure out... Do the apps match each persons age filters to each other? Or does it just show you absolutely everyone in your age range? Ie. If I (31) have it set 21-30 and they (27) have it set to 21-30, would they even show up on my list? Or would they only show up on mine and it would it be like I never existed to them?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Dating app age filters
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/f94ii2/dating_app_age_filters/
|
superfapper2000
|
2023-07-24 12:13:57
| 1,690,200,837
| 0
|
['dating apps']
| 0
|
1588yqg
| true
| null | 45
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/1588yqg/how_do_you_have_a_desire_to_date_after_being/
| 70
|
28 male, only went on 2 official date's my whole life. All, of them after the first date stopped talking to me and I stopped dating in general. My friend's says that I have great qualities and how it's a shame how no one has noticed me. These past couple of years I have been "focusing on myself" by doing things that I like, such as going to concerts, anime cons, sleeping, playing video games, playing volleyball with my family, and reading manga. I have been happier just never really dated anyone and my brain keep having fantasies about girls in college or HS that I knew. How do I know that I'm ready to date again? I don't feel ready because I still live with my parents don't have car, and only met those dates on dating apps or ex coworkers.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How do you have a desire to date after being single for so long?
| 70
| 0.99
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1588yqg/how_do_you_have_a_desire_to_date_after_being/
|
blactrick
|
2023-04-30 23:55:40
| 1,682,898,940
| 0
| null | 0
|
1346zal
| true
| null | 6
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/1346zal/if_youre_the_initiator_leads_convo_talking_points/
| 3
| null |
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
If you're the initiator (leads convo talking points, plans date, essentially takes charge during a match) and get a date, how would you like the next date or next steps to go?
| 3
| 0.8
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1346zal/if_youre_the_initiator_leads_convo_talking_points/
|
PM_ME_YOUR_BEDTIMES
|
2021-07-31 05:58:15
| 1,627,711,095
| null |
['tinder']
| 0
|
ov1v1d
| true
| null | 27
| 0
|
/r/AskMen/comments/ov1v1d/guys_what_does_a_good_conversation_look_like/
| 0
|
What does a healthy conversation look like to you when you think a girl is into you? I got this girls number and snap and I can’t really tell if she wants to talk to me or not. I mean before that, during work everything seemed fine, we were talking back and forth and she even told me the days she’s free so we can go to this festival together (which I assume means she’s at least into me or else she would have found a way around that and rejected me in a way). But now when I’m talking to her via snap, I’m writing like 1-4 sentences (lol because “BE YOURSELF) and she’s responding back with a few words, MAYBE a sentence here and there. I mean AT LEAST I’m not just getting “yeah haha” or “Ks” so that’s something. But still, what do you guys make of that? It just makes me worried because I’ve never been really good with girls before. All my guy friends are 100x more attractive than me (I’m not not attractive but At the same time Im not a model). All my other guy friends always get girls and they are really good with them, they get like 100 matches on tinder and girls always hit on them. But me, I’m just really awkward and introverted so I’ve never been good at talking to girls. A lot of the time (like when I’m going to sleep) I think to myself “did I just say something really stupid” because they will either leave me on read or never respond which is super awkward. But noooooooo not my guy friends. They ALWAYS have something to say and can keep a conversation going for as long as they want.
|
AskMen
|
t5_2s30g
|
Guys, what does a good conversation look like?
| null | 0.5
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/ov1v1d/guys_what_does_a_good_conversation_look_like/
|
mylifeiskindaboring
|
2019-04-30 11:40:42
| 1,556,624,442
| null |
['tinder']
| 0
|
bj2a8b
| true
| null | 8
| 0
|
/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/bj2a8b/i_moved_back_into_my_dads_house_last_night/
| 0
|
I need help understanding me. So the guy i met on tinder, my former roommate, had feelings for me that I couldn't reciprocate. He said he loved me but I didn't love him. However, it made me so jealous that he found another girl on tinder and after a week, they have their first date and he tells me can I spend the night at my moms house for a day because she spent the night at his house in the bed that we slept it. So after that, I decided I needed to move out. But last night, at around 8 pm, i came over his house and packed up my stuff and then told him that i wanted to wait until tomorrow to leave. He was fine with that. However, I became emotional because I felt like he was indifferent about me. I layed under the covers and starting crying until i finally decided to communicate with him how I feel. I asked him if he could hold me and he did. He addressed my feelings but said that there's no reason for me to be sad because im the one who didn't want to be with him and he has to move on. I understood that. But then I really didn't. Because I told him that we could have sex if he lets me read the text messages exchanged between him and her. For what though? Because I was jealous. So after reading the text messages and seeing that he texted her immediately after he got off work and they were super flirty with the "i miss you"'s and he said "i just really want you here right now" i got super mad and started going off on this dude. I went off on him until he finally lost his cool and said "why don't you pack up your shit and get the hell out of my house." I argued saying that i could stay there until the 5th since I already paid rent. Then he said no lets go. And then he said "why dont you stop being a fucking bitch". And slammed the door real hard. So that's the end of us. I don't want to feel this rage in my heart or blow up his phone with petty text messages like I usually do after a break up. I already deleted his number and everything. I just feel like i had so many good times with this guy, i just wasn't attracted to him enough to be in a relationship with him. But if i wasnt attracted to him enough to be in a relationship with him, why am i so jealous that he is with some other girl? The same thing happens every time. I ex best friend was overweight and unhygienic and very sensitive and clingy but any time he would mention another girl, i would get super mad. I was roommates with this guy for a month but I've known him for 4 months.
|
TwoXChromosomes
|
t5_2r2jt
|
I moved back into my dads house last night because my roommate kicked me out.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/bj2a8b/i_moved_back_into_my_dads_house_last_night/
|
Overall-Box-657
|
2024-05-11 13:58:31
| 1,715,435,911
| 0
|
['tinder']
| 0
|
1cpi3np
| true
| null | 2
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/1cpi3np/not_sure_what_to_do_anymore_single_male_24_who/
| 2
|
Im a 24 year old male who has never been in a serious relationship. I have talked to girls before but it has never led to anything such as a date, just casual flirting and possibly at times becoming friend zoned. As of late, I have lost contact with most of the girls I was talking to as they all have moved on and gotten boyfriends. Im now at the age where everyone around me is getting into relationships but I have no hope as I dont even know how to begin interacting with women. Im not sure how to "slide into dm's", at university, Im too shy to get into conversations with people and in general I feel like Im just socially awkward. I have a constant fear that the whole world will keep advancing and ill be stuck alone forever. Im getting constant pressure from family members who are unsure why Im not interested in women (but they dont realise im genuinely unable to interact or even strike up a conversation with girls my age), I constantly get seen as "maybe hes gay" which has created more issues throughout my family. I just really need a girlfriend but im not sure how to go about it. Ive thought about opening up a tinder (or likewise) account which I feel would be easier as I wouldnt have to physically approach a girl like at uni or at a party, however I feel worried that other people will see my account and make fun or judge me. I have crushes who I want to follow on insta and start conversations but im too scared: 1. Because I dont know if they are single or not and the idea of hitting on a taken girl scares me 2. Becuase im not sure how to slide into dm's. Every girl I've taked to before, added me and started the conversation with me. Im not sure how to initiate contact. 3. Because the idea of being rejected by someone who is known in my community or someone who has common friends with me scares me. Like I dont want people to know that I tried to get with a girl they know and I failed. Im getting really anxious and depressed over this, and Im not sure on how to fix this. Any one with any advice would be so much appreciated.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Not Sure What To Do Anymore - Single Male (24) Who Needs Advice
| 2
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1cpi3np/not_sure_what_to_do_anymore_single_male_24_who/
|
yawahroth
|
2012-12-31 09:57:57
| 1,356,947,877
| 0
|
['online dating']
| 0
|
15pvl0
| null | null | 11
| null |
/r/AskMen/comments/15pvl0/i_dont_know_how_to_date/
| 10
|
I'm an early 20's male. I've been in one brief high school relationship, and one fairly serious college relationship (dated for 2 years) that didn't work out for various reasons. However, in both of these cases, I got to know the girl as friends first, through school and other activities. Both of them ended up making pretty overt advances on me before I was able to actually ask them out. So, essentially, I've never actually asked a girl out. I've never had a one night stand or even kissed a girl that I wasn't dating. I've never even had a "date" experience (as in, doing some activity with a girl with the express intention of getting to know her while both parties are possibly interested in dating). My previous relationship ended about a year ago, and I'm now wanting to see what's out there, but I don't get out much. I'm just an introverted person by nature, and most of my interests don't involve meeting new people. I'll be starting graduate school in a year at which point I'll be even more busy working on my thesis and TAing. I'm not the kind of person who would have any luck at a bar. So, I created an online dating profile. I think I'm pretty decent looking, and I am in a good spot in my life. As a result, I actually get a lot of messages from girls who are interested. However, I very rarely reply to these messages and have never had anything lead to a date. I guess the main reasons I don't reply to these girls are: - I have pretty high standards when it comes to education, and strongly prefer someone who has a college education in a sciencey field. I think I get along best with people fitting that description. Is this eliminating too many people though? - Sometimes there are people who I would be interested in a casual/sexual relationship with, but know that I wouldn't want to date them. Should I... say that? It seems to me that a lot of guys will simply lie about being interested in dating for the sake of hooking up with the girl (or perhaps just don't care what the girl they date is like as long as she's good looking enough and willing to have sex). Regardless, I would not at all be opposed to a purely sexual relationship or hook up, but don't know how to do so without being an ass. Well I've now rambled on for a pretty long time... but I guess it comes down to the fact that I'm pretty confident in myself and what I can offer a potential partner, and am well liked by girls that I get to know through school. However, I don't really meet people anymore. I don't know how to show girls I'm interested in them shortly after meeting them. I'm hesitant to even chat with girls online if they seem to be incompatible with me in any way. Would asking a girl on a date, even if I'm not particularly interested in her, be a good idea for the sake of practice? I'm just terrified of having an awkward few hours and/or having to tell her afterward that I'm not interested in going on a 2nd date or finding that I am more interested in her than I thought after meeting in person, but she doesn't feel the same way... typical fear of rejection, I guess. I'm also not a very good conversationalist and can be extremely awkward when speaking to people that I don't know, and I'm sure this contributes to my hesitancy to actually do something and take the next step.
|
AskMen
|
t5_2s30g
|
I don't know how to date.
| 10
| null |
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/15pvl0/i_dont_know_how_to_date/
|
DisruptRoutine
|
2019-08-27 21:25:11
| 1,566,941,111
| null |
['matches', 'OLD']
| 0
|
cwatr1
| true
| null | 34
| 0
|
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/cwatr1/know_what_i_am_looking_for_dont_know_wherehow_to/
| 4
|
Backstory (Feel free to skip): 33M. In my 20's I had quite a few awesome girlfriends that just didn't work out. I realized that it was mostly because of where I was in my life, so I took some time off for dating to figure out myself. It took much longer than I expected at 4 years to figure out how to be happy with myself. About a year ago I met an amazing woman walking my dog. We clicked and everything was super easy. I could tell all of the soul searching and self-improvement paid off, as I was confident in the relationship and myself. Things started to get serious. I met her mom, and she was going to meet my parents and we started talking about living together. Suddenly, she started acting weird one day, and I find out she got a text from her ex-husband. Within hours we were broken up. She claimed that it was because she needed to deal with stuff on her end, and see a therapist. I ended up finding out a couple of weeks ago that she is with another guy (I saw them walking her dog together), which I expected, but she hid from me in all communication. This ended up being the best thing for me, as getting over her became so much easier. Current Situation: Now, looking back on this relationship made me realize what I am really looking for and what to strive for. \- Empathy, vulnerability, and communication are key \- Hobbies and friends outside of the relationship, but not afraid to involve S.O. occasionally \- Belief and practice in Self-improvement and continued education \- Social and enjoys doing all different types of activities, including multi-day festivals, live music, road trips, etc. \- Someone who enjoys and respects mind-altering substances (weed, psychedelics, etc) but doesn't abuse them (this one tends to scare off people) \- Does not expect to be fixed or made whole by a SO (this does not mean doesn't have problems, we all do) \- In support of liberal policies and goals (this was the one thing my ex-girlfriend and I didn't agree on, but she made up for it in demonstrations of empathy in other areas of her life) The biggest issue I come across is finding people (and not just dates) who have these qualities. OLD has been pretty much a failure for me, as I find it next to unbearable starting a conversation over text-based communication with someone I know nothing about. I also am not very photogenic, so don't get many matches (Everyone I have met in person tells me I am better looking in person) Does anyone have any ideas on activities to do, places to go, groups to join, or even apps to join to help meet like-minded people? I live in Los Angeles if that helps.
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
Know What I Am Looking For, Don't Know Where/How to Find Her
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/cwatr1/know_what_i_am_looking_for_dont_know_wherehow_to/
|
Bruinsrock11
|
2019-04-29 15:22:22
| 1,556,551,342
| null |
['dating app', 'facebook dating']
| 0
|
biqpkb
| true
| null | 3
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/biqpkb/when_is_the_facebook_dating_app_supposed_to/
| 1
|
Since the people in Canada got it in 2018 https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Facebook_Dating
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
When is the "Facebook Dating App" supposed to launch in the US?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/biqpkb/when_is_the_facebook_dating_app_supposed_to/
|
StillRare7904
|
2024-02-18 20:05:55
| 1,708,286,755
| 0
|
['dating apps']
| 0
|
1au3cu1
| true
|
Question ❓
| 7
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1au3cu1/what_do_you_think_about_this_girl_if_you_dated/
| 1
|
So this is about my boyfriend's ex and I am trying to figure out if he really moved on or not. First things first, he was 18, I was 16, in 2016, we both liked each other, didn't confess, we slowly moved on and he dated her. I dated my ex. My ex cheated multiple times, lied about everything, crossed my physical boundaries on a daily basis, talked down on me, controlled me and isolated me. There were 127 red flags and I was severely trauma bonded. We broke up and got back together over 18 times in a year. I know how hard it was for me to move on, I forced myself to be mean to my ex so that he will hate me and won't come back though I loved him because I knew he wasn't good for me and I knew he will come back. It worked, he ended up hating me, good. I could finally block and move on. BUT HERE IS THE THING, My boyfriend's ex is MUCH MUCH worse than my ex. She dated 11 guys before my ex, she had a new boyfriend every 3 months, she would post various guys (her friends) on her stories talking about how she loves them and misses them. She slept with multiple guys. She loves posting revealing pictures of herself. She's on dating apps. She would give the silent treatment for 1-2 weeks. She PHYSICALLY cheated multiple times. She has verbally abused my boyfriend, she physically hit him and threw utensils on his head. She broke his phone. She got into his home and asked him to get out. She would slam his laptop when he doesn't give her attention. After the breakup she posted disgusting stories about him. Very disturbing stories about her hurting him. Lots of awfully bad rumors. She's now married and she named her son after my boyfriend. She changed her surname on instagram to that of my boyfriend. She follows only 15 guys, 13 are her exes, 1 is her husband, and 1 is her 1 year old son. MY QUESTION IS. If I lost my patience with my ex, who's much less worser than his ex, how is he so patient with his ex????? Please tell me, will anyone actually recover from dating a girl as awful as her ?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
What do you think about this girl? If you dated her, how long will it take for you to heal and move on?
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1au3cu1/what_do_you_think_about_this_girl_if_you_dated/
|
irepMiami
|
2020-11-16 08:27:39
| 1,605,515,259
| null |
['tinder']
| 0
|
jv3d1d
| true
|
Venting
| 6
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/jv3d1d/met_up_with_a_girl_again_i_use_to_date_who/
| 4
|
2 years ago, I met a girl on Tinder and we were in the preliminary stages of dating/talking. At the time she was finishing up her undergraduate at UCF and I was working a 9-5 at Lockheed Martin. Her goal was to apply to grad school for nursing. Over the course of 3 months, I started noticing nothing was really progressing, everything seemed stagnant as if she hadn’t fully committed to me. She started to lose interest, barely texting or calling me and she wouldn’t have sex with me at all (she wanted to wait until she knew I was “husband material”). She’s not a super religious person btw. But I soon realized her 1st ex still plays a huge part in her life. We’ve had a discussion about him before but she downplayed it as if she didn’t really talk to him. At the time they would talk and text daily, they have been broken up at least 4 or 5 times but she still wouldn’t break things off with him completely. She met that guy when she was 19. She’s 29 and I’m 28. She’s had other relationships before me but she even claimed that she has a habit of not being fully committed with those guys. This obviously led to many arguments with us and I eventually told her I can’t continue this unless you break it off with him all together. She cried hysterically and it felt like she was being ripped apart from someone she couldn’t live without. I broke things off with her because apparently he came into town and at that point she wasn’t really talking to me as much. 2 years later (now) I contacted her to see how she was doing because I did miss her company and I had wondered if things changed. She was happy to meet for lunch and it turns out...nothings changed. She got back with him during that time we weren’t talking and they broke up AGAIN. Also she just now is applying to grad school for nursing. She still admits that they still talk and that she can’t just stop talking to someone she’s known since she was 19. Needless to say. I was disappointed in the whole date. I was eager to tell her how much my life has changed and how happy I was at this point but it seem she was uninterested, like if someone else still occupied her mind. Glancing at her phone, looking off, texting quickly then putting it down. I left that date feeling horrible, I just don’t understand how someone can allow an ex to plague their life and be completely oblivious to it. Why can’t she see that he IS the problem? I don’t plan on seeing her again.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Met up with a girl again I use to date who wouldn’t stop talking to her 1st ex.
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/jv3d1d/met_up_with_a_girl_again_i_use_to_date_who/
|
DarkSight31
|
2022-10-17 17:25:31
| 1,666,027,531
| null |
['dating apps']
| 0
|
y6h0ss
| true
| null | 255
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/y6h0ss/as_a_28_yo_man_how_could_i_meet_single_women_who/
| 674
|
I feel like a vast majority of women on dating apps only put "travel, hiking and partying" in their hobbies. I'm not against it, I like it sometimes too. It's just that it would be exhausting if it was all the things I would do with my partner. I don't get any match on these apps any way x) I love reading, watching movies and series, gaming, drawing, cooking... And honestly, that's probably 80% of what I do outside of work. I can't see myself in a relationship where I can't share that. The thing is, I don't know how to meet more people like me \^\^' Almost every new person I meet is through work or drawing classes, but most women are already in relationships.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
As a 28 yo man, how could I meet single women who enjoys spending time at home ?
| null | 0.96
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/y6h0ss/as_a_28_yo_man_how_could_i_meet_single_women_who/
|
MrLustWander
|
2019-12-29 11:55:53
| 1,577,620,553
| null |
['matches', 'swipe', 'swiping', 'dating app', 'dating apps']
| 0
|
eh55xe
| true
| null | 17
| 0
|
/r/datingoverfifty/comments/eh55xe/20_things_to_stop_doing_on_dating_apps_in_2020/
| 11
|
I saw in my stream of year end headlines and took the click-bait. There are some interesting points made here. Some I agreed with and others I did not. I suspect this list would have a few different items if authored by a man. I have not used a dating app in almost 2 years so I really don't have a horse in this race but I think this could be a good conversation starter. As some of us approach the new year with brushed up profiles and updated pictures, what items on this list do we think should be left behind? What items do you feel are on this list that shouldn't be? And what items are not on the list that you think should be? For those who don't have time to read the full article or the author's justification for her list of things we should stop doing in dating apps, here is her list of things we should stop doing. 1. Pretending to be very over/ambivalent about/too good for dating apps 2 . Asking for someone’s Snapchat before their phone number 3. Exchanging numbers too early 4. Starting conversations with “hey” 5. Starting a conversation with one of the app’s pre-written conversation starters 6. Overusing someone’s name 7. Too many group pics 8. Having fewer than three pictures 9. Selfies 10. Pictures that aren’t you 11. Using pictures of yourself at the Women’s March 12. Callin yourself an “entrepreneur” 13. Lying about your age 14. Listing very specific height/weight/body type requirements 15. Really long bios 16. Makng your entire profile about dogs 17. “Swipe left if you are/are not arbitrary thing I like/dislike”. 18. Messaging matches you’ve never met in real life because you happened to actually spot them out in the wild and recognized them from the app 19. Rapid-fire right swiping on every single prospective match 20. Getting butthurt about ghosting I would probably agree with 1, 2, 4, 8, 10, 13, 14, 17, 18, 19, and 20. I'd add Using snapchat filters, lying about your relationship status, and having no text at all in a bio.
|
datingoverfifty
|
t5_12ieog
|
20 Things to Stop Doing on Dating Apps in 2020
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/eh55xe/20_things_to_stop_doing_on_dating_apps_in_2020/
|
BirdyRC
|
2021-02-04 16:15:09
| 1,612,455,309
| null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0
|
lcj5f8
| true
|
I Need Advice
| 12
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/lcj5f8/how_can_i_show_a_guy_im_interested_over_text/
| 5
|
I've been "friends" with this guy for a couple of months now and I don't know how to flirt/show my interest in him. We matched on Tinder and talk everyday, but idk where the relationship is going. I think he thinks I only like him as a friend but we finally met up to hangout last weekend (we live 4 hours from each other) and it was kinda awkward, but good. We didn't hold hands, but hugged at the beginning and end. I made him some homemade cookies and he got me my favorite alcohol, both were surprise gifts we didn't know we were getting each other. I think maybe it was awkward because we both like each other. How do you flirt over text and how can I show my interest? I'm so scared to use kiss/heart emojis because I'm scared I'll push him away or something but I feel like I'm starting to friend zone myself. I'm just a really really bad texter. Any help is appreciated!
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
How can I show a guy I'm interested over text?
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/lcj5f8/how_can_i_show_a_guy_im_interested_over_text/
|
Rottencore1
|
2018-12-16 22:57:47
| 1,545,001,067
| null |
['matches', 'tinder']
| 0
|
a6tv9b
| true
| null | 18
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/a6tv9b/met_a_girl_two_weeks_ago_things_seemed_promising/
| 3
|
TLDR: Things were going well with girl I met 2 weeks ago. She stated she met someone else at same time as me. This other guy is from out of state and married but getting divorced, decided to play it off and see what happens. Went on few more dates, went well, became physically intimate, approached her about this again. Stated she told him she couldnt be with him because of his baggage. Went on few more dates things continued to go well and progress. Sudden flip switch and change that intuition ques you in on. Less texting, continue to put off scheduling a date. Approached her about this, stated she couldnt bring herself to end it with him and is still trying to decide. He is flying back home for holdiays so she has been spending time with him which is why she is texting less. Pretty pissed at this but still trying to be logical. Should i just keep low expectations and see how it plays out. Part of me thinks i am just safety net, part of me feels she doesnt want to confront things and will just slowly fade out. Yet I still think logic dictates to just see where it goes. So I have had an interesting love life to say the least. My longest relationship was with a chronic cheater. My shortest yet most compatible relationship was with someone who was a closet lesbian. Now to top it all off I met a girl that for the first time in almost a year I thought I found to be compatible for a long term relationship, and it turns out there is another dude in the picture. Let me give you the background, I met this girl on tinder as dating in this age often occurs. Went on a date and she seemed pretty nervous, which is a nice change seeing as im usually the nervous one lmao. Anyway things went well, the time flew by next thing were holding hands walking around and its 4am. Had another date went well ended in a kiss, had a third went better and ended in bed. Things were going good, we had similar interests, similar careers both well paying, both similar intellect. Something to be excited for to see where it goes. Well after the 2nd date she came forth to me and told me her situation. She met another person at the same time as me, also went on some dates, also had a really good time and now she was stuck between these two situations that she promised she didnt want to find herself in. So Okay, this happens, people entertain more than one person at the early stages, I have been there before, I get it, and I appreciate her openess where most would just hide this fact untill they made their choice. So I decided to be cool with this, the logical approach is to lower expectations and to play it out see what happens. Welp that approach got me to date 3 so refer back to the top to see the results ;). After this occured naturally its a big step in early relationships so a few days later I asked her what the situation is with the other guy. Here is where it gets juicy, turns out this guy is from out of state but here for business, has a wife but getting divorced, and she explained how we are total opposites. He is the typical bad boy and I am the typical safe stable choice (what a sexy category to fall under lol) She stated although she was interested she couldnt see a relationship working with him so she told him as such. Okay perfect moving on, we had 1 or 2 more dates things were going good. Well not so fast. I spent a night over her place and then suddenly the flip switched, you know that intuition we all have when something has changed. She started responding far less often, not setting up dates like previously, giving me the have to check my schedule. Sure we still talked and she promised a future date but something was off. So I decided to ask her if something was going on. She explained that she tried telling this other guy that she only wanted to be friends but she couldnt bring herself to do it. That he was flying back home to be with his family for the holidays so shes been seeing him the past few days and didnt feel right texting both of us while with one or the other. I asked if she hopes his situations will resolve or if shes thinking of dating him and she stated she is still trying to decide between us and she is seeing if she can deal with his situation or if she even wants to because that situation wont resolve. That she can only make this decision once and not look back so it needs to be the right one. To say the least I was kind of pissed over this, sure again appreciate honesty, understand her reasoning but still kind of pissed. She told me one thing but did another. I was about ready to make her choice for her and just call it off. However I try to live a life of logic, I have no commitment to this girl, Ive known her for about 2 weeks, I wont make a decision right this second, I will let it play it. If it works out it does if it doesnt who cares I will move on. See im trying to live by that, but it requires no emotions, and while it keeps mine in check I wont lie and say this situation kind of sucks. I also cant shake the feeling that its logical to assume she is more interested in this dude than myself. I mean you considered all the other influences involved, married, out of state, and it seems like a clear cut answer. Obviously she has to be more attracted to this other dude because if it was a 50/50 you take the readily available person. So it makes me feel like I am the security net here, if things dont work out to fall back on. Otherwise why even entertain the thought of something between yourself and a married man that lives flying distance away from you. I know, nothing is a vacumm, I can tell she was interested in me from the time we spent together, but its just hard knowing your competition is a god damn married man lol. She still hasnt set up an additional date but claims she will, I have decided to no longer ask and leave that up to her. She still messages me less than before although that conversation only happened yesterday. Another part of me feels like shes just going to slowly fade out rather than face the confrontation. So there is my situation, logically there is no reason not to just wait and see what happens, I think I already know ive lost this one and thats sort of my expectation at this point. However why deny the possibility of something working. She hasnt handled this situation herself perfectly but then again 90% of people wouldnt tell you a thing then just ghost you one day so there is that. So any advice or opinions? I know many people would just say they are out at this point. I also dont want to come off as some push over, because reality is and I made it clear to her is I have a time limit. I will tolerate this for now and give her time to figure things out but when I reach the point of feeling strung along I am out. However I dont want to be hasty and shut a potential door to a relationship. Im not going to ask to set up a date I am leaving that to her. There are times where I texted her late at night and she didnt respond, I assume shes sleeping, but will go hours in to the next day without a response, in which ill send a brief text and the convo will pick back up. However, a part of me feels I should just not send that text and see if the feeling I have will come true and she will simply just drift off. Ill give it a week I think and see where things stand, but I do plan on keeping myself available in the mean time to other potential matches.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Met a girl two weeks ago, things seemed promising, found out she met someone else at same time and is in interested in us both? Now she is trying to decide between the two of us, need advice.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/a6tv9b/met_a_girl_two_weeks_ago_things_seemed_promising/
|
marianna_denka
|
2020-01-19 18:08:07
| 1,579,457,287
| null |
['OLD']
| 0
|
eqzs21
| true
| null | 3
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/eqzs21/how_to_have_more_fun/
| 2
|
I am 26F. Very career-oriented. Since last heartbreak in summer 2017, I’ve done some OLD and dating IRL but I wasn’t over the previous guy so I ended all of those. I decided to focus on my career. Study, volunteer, gain certification etc. Recently I realized, I cannot even remember when’s the last time I truly had fun - feeling that happiness from within. Not sense of achievement of ticking a box. I feel so sad. And even people around me say I need more fun. But how? I know OLD is stressful and women are lucky to find someone among many guys just fooling around. How do you find fun in your life that disregard dating related?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How to have more fun?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/eqzs21/how_to_have_more_fun/
|
AmelieTheGhost
|
2023-09-27 04:49:24
| 1,695,790,164
| 0
|
['OLD', 'dating app']
| 0
|
16tb5n4
| true
| null | 1
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/16tb5n4/is_this_girl_a_walking_red_flag_or_am_i_crazy_tw/
| 1
|
Met a girl on OLD last night. We talked about our previous dates on the app and she went off on a tangent about how she met her first real boyfriend on the app, lost her virginity to him, and then he cheated on her. And then she tells me that she got coerced into giving someone a blowjob to give a ride to said boyfriends place (so, rape). Besides that we had a great conversation and talks about having our first date. I asked her if she was even ready for a relationship and she said yes so ok. I asked for her number, and she said she isn’t comfortable giving out her number to people she just met and gave her social media. Fast forward to next day, she texts me good morning on the social media app, we talk for a bit and then radio silence for about 12 hours. During this time I see her posting on said social media. I recognize that some people are just busy and can’t respond but not replying for twelve hours when you’re clearly not busy irks me. They’re posting on the social media app that I messaged them on lol. I decided to double text to break the silence and got an immediate text back, no mention of the silence. I go on the dating app again and see they revamped their profile with new photos. Is this a waste of time? Are they just playing games? She honestly reminds me of a bipolar disorder girl I dated shortly in my teens, who also trauma dumped on me immediately about her sexual assault experience and then proceeded to cheat on me with three other guys. She was crazy manipulative, threatening to not take her medications and playing the victim every time I tried to call her out I get that SA makes people act selfishly and impulsively, but honestly I learned from my ex that that’s not my problem. I am a couple years older now, and this girl is in her 20’s too, so I give more benefit of the doubt that they’re functioning adults. But this looks like a repeat of the other girl
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Is this girl a walking red flag or am I crazy (TW: Mentions of SA)
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/16tb5n4/is_this_girl_a_walking_red_flag_or_am_i_crazy_tw/
|
Try_another-o_o
|
2024-04-27 12:46:24
| 1,714,221,984
| 0
|
['matched', 'swipe', 'swiping', 'tinder']
| 0
|
1cedpnm
| true
|
Question ❓
| 18
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1cedpnm/why_are_people_on_tinder_so_blazè/
| 8
|
I'm sure most if you must know, especially considering how often I hear this complaint from others aswell, how frustrating it is to be carrying conversations because someone you matched with doesn't actually care in the slightest to engage in the interaction. It's like pulling teeth. I have my own theories, (for example: they're simply just swiping randomly and don't actually care who they're swiping on, and if you swipe aswell but don't actually fit what they're looking for, they don't really engage) but I'd like to know what everyone else thinks, or if there's maybe someone here who does this themselves, why?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Why are people on tinder so blazè?
| 8
| 0.83
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1cedpnm/why_are_people_on_tinder_so_blazè/
|
hawaiancanuck
|
2020-02-04 00:49:39
| 1,580,777,379
| null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0
|
eyheil
| true
| null | 2
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/eyheil/have_an_upcoming_date_but_is_this_cause_for/
| 1
|
So I (M27) have a date with a very cute girl (F25) I matched with on Tinder. We hit it off and it appears we have some similar interests so I asked her if she ever wanted to grab a coffee and meetup in person. She did and I was ecstatic. However, i was nervous about the date so when I was a few drinks in this past weekend and weak willee, I thought I should try to see if I could find her on Instagram to see if there were any conversation starters incase the date conversations start to deindle. I know I shouldn't have done this, but ultimately it's done now and I found pictures of her and a guy who I believe is a boyfriend barely a week ago taken on the instagram. How do I go about basically asking her if she has a bf? I've made it really clear it's a date and she has to so I'm curious what people think. Thanks in advance!
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Have an upcoming date but is this cause for concern?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/eyheil/have_an_upcoming_date_but_is_this_cause_for/
|
Rescue-Randy
|
2021-05-14 04:22:06
| 1,620,966,126
| null |
['dating apps']
| 0
|
nc06s7
| true
|
Venting
| 27
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/nc06s7/whats_it_like_dating_as_a_59_male/
| 2
|
Oh let me tell you 5’9” isn’t even that short but god forbid I’m not 6 ft tall I have tried dating many ways but today was the last straw Fuck the society of woman that think you need to be 6ft tall to be dateable... Most girls I meet are over dating apps since my area is very remote and I don’t disclose my height unless asked. Well this is the 5th girl I have met up with and I have been judged by my height more than my personality. They are very interested in me till they comment on my height. Today I randomly met the girl I have been talking to and literally the first thing she comments is my height we only talked for 5 minutes and then proceeds to ghost me afterwords. Now we have been talking and flirting for about 4-5 days so i don’t think it could be anything else. This has happened way to often. Why are men looked at as lesser men if they don’t fit the standard of height for these girls? Why should I have to suffer finding a partner because I’m not tall enough?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
What’s it like dating as a 5’9” male?
| null | 0.62
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/nc06s7/whats_it_like_dating_as_a_59_male/
|
JT1921
|
2022-02-24 20:02:06
| 1,645,732,926
| null |
['dating apps']
| 0
|
t0jyb1
| true
| null | 7
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/t0jyb1/where_to_meet_guys/
| 0
|
I’m (28f) sick of dating apps, I feel like it’s the same people on it all the time. I never meet anyone while I’m out because most of my friends are couples or they’re guys, so it’s hard to meet other guys because they think you’re dating someone in the group. Where do y’all even meet people to date?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Where to meet guys?
| null | 0.5
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/t0jyb1/where_to_meet_guys/
|
lodfed
|
2020-01-06 00:10:50
| 1,578,269,450
| null |
['dating apps', 'tinder']
| 0
|
eklj7g
| true
| null | 7
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/eklj7g/woman_26_i_thought_was_my_25_soulmate_lied_about/
| 0
|
I met a woman from tinder at the end of November in my home town during thanksgiving break and we’ve hit it off pretty intensely in the last 5 weeks. I’ve never felt so strongly so quickly or felt such a deep connection towards another human being in my life. And I’m not someone who hasn’t had dating experience either or someone who jumps in quickly. I’ve had girlfriends since I was 15 and am usually rarely single. I dated someone for 3 years and even then, it didn’t feel like this. We talk for hours at night, about anything, about everything and I’m constantly wanting to see her, constantly thinking about her. I wanted to tell her I loved her after just 2 weeks. I was terrified of scaring her off but she told me she felt the same way. We spent NYE together and it was amazing. I was to the point of wanting to move back home to be closer to her (we live about an hour apart). I started to talk about making things official and she began to pull away and say she was confused and I didn’t know her as well as I thought. She broke things off with me a few days ago and I’ve been completely sick to my stomach, miserable, crying when I’m alone. I’ve never acted this way over a girl. I finally got her to meet with me in person today and she told me she has a 5 year old son. She had never used dating apps much before and didn’t think anything serious would come from it. She didn’t want to reveal too much about herself and said I mentioned something on the first date about kids being a turn off (which I don’t remember?). She said as we talked more the opportunity to mention her son came and went and she felt like she had gone too long without mentioning it that it had become a lie. We only talked for about 20 mins because I had no idea what to say or how to react. I haven’t told any of my friends because I’m embarrassed and feel stupid/duped. Somehow I still feel in love with her and don’t know what to do. She apologized for misleading me and said she still loves me and everything else that happened was real. What should I do?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Woman [26] I thought was my [25] soulmate lied about having a kid?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/eklj7g/woman_26_i_thought_was_my_25_soulmate_lied_about/
|
Icy_Net31
|
2023-11-03 16:56:47
| 1,699,030,607
| 0
|
['dating app']
| 0
|
17mzm3s
| true
| null | 1
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/17mzm3s/testing_post/
| 1
|
I 30M and 31F met on a dating app and after some time we started talking and met for the first time. After some time we got closer but there was always ambiguity
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Testing Post
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17mzm3s/testing_post/
|
asakura10
|
2019-05-18 08:36:18
| 1,558,168,578
| null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0
|
bq1pjy
| true
| null | 4
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/bq1pjy/so_i_matched_with_my_crush_20m_on_tinder_now_what/
| 2
|
I (20F) used to idolise and have a huge crush on him years ago bc we had similar tastes in music and i found him cute. My then close friend was his neighbour and childhood friend as well. Nothing happened and i kind of lost interest eventually. I have never talked to him in real life before so he definitely does not remember me because we were from different schools as well. Recently i created a tinder account out of boredom, and chanced upon his profile within 5 minutes. I had the shock of my life and smashed the superlike. (What could possibly go wrong right? I have nothing to lose) We matched and honestly i didnt think id get this far. I know we have similar interests (photography) and music taste. I don’t really know how to proceed from here on. Please advise, i have no idea what to do. And I don’t wanna seem creepy either. So far i’ve just said hi and complimented his photography. And we talked about cameras for a while.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
So... i matched with my crush (20M) on tinder. now what?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/bq1pjy/so_i_matched_with_my_crush_20m_on_tinder_now_what/
|
seemingempty
|
2020-02-20 21:06:36
| 1,582,232,796
| null |
['dating apps']
| 0
|
f6zr5e
| true
| null | 1
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/f6zr5e/almost_two_and_a_half_years_and_i_havent_had_the/
| 1
|
I'm 23M. I'm diagnosed with Asperger's, although I have it pretty mildly and put a lot of effort into my social skills. I'm still not completely perfect, but I feel like it could be much, much worse. In fact, a lot of people are surprised when I tell them I have Asperger's. I don't have a lot of friends, and I've always been fairly introverted. In fact, I used to be much, much more introverted than I am today. When I was in high school I was extremely self-isolating and afraid to make much social contact at all. I really only had one friend, and he didn't even go to the same school as me. Other people tried to make friends with me at my high school but I was just anti-social and wanted to be left alone most of the time. As I got into my senior year I broke out of my shell and started wanting social contact with people my age, but I really had no idea how to make friends and didn't have much luck with it. Despite this, I had a girl in my grade who was interested in me, but she wasn't exactly the best person or someone who was fun to be around. She was arrogant and smug, rude, selfish, hated anyone who was more popular than her, unmotivated and lazy, and just to top everything off, she had absolutely terrible personal hygiene. Partly because of of low self-esteem and partly because of what my parents told me, I got it into my head that this was the only type of woman who would ever be interested in me. I ended up figuring that if I didn't want to date women like this then I should just get used to being single forever. My parents have told me many times that because I have Asperger's, almost no women will ever be interested in me. They've told me that I should not try to date any extroverted or popular women, and also not to go for anyone who I'm attracted to, because none of them would ever like me when they could have popular, successful, neurotypical men instead. After I graduated I started my first college program. It was a one year program that I was really mostly taking to get used to the college experience. I had made a couple other friends since graduating high school, but I still was pretty clueless about dating and didn't really know how to pick up on cues. I'm pretty sure someone in that program had a crush on me, but I never noticed the whole time and thought that she was just being friendly, so I was just polite and friendly back to her. Never went any further. And yeah, I kind of regret that, and I feel bad for her looking back, but that was nothing compared to what was coming. After I finished my college program I then went to a larger university, which was my first time staying away from home. I got to know a few people in my class and started talking to them, and there was one woman who I clicked with almost right away. We had so much in common. We had similar interests and hobbies. We liked the same movies, books, and music. We cared about the same world issues and we were both into volunteering and activism. And she is still one of the nicest and sweetest people I've ever met in my life. We got along really, really well. We met at the start September and had pretty much all of the same classes, and by November I started getting feelings for her. I wanted to ask her out, but I was convinced she was totally out of my league. Like I said, my parents had always told me not to go for popular or attractive women, and she was both gorgeous and fairly popular (not the most popular in the program, but still with a good sized circle of friends and at least a few guys who were interested in her). I figured that it was great that she was my friend and decided to leave it at that. Towards the end of first semester, I was talking with some people. I don't remember exactly how this came up, but one of her friends actually said to me "Hey, seemingempty, we need to get you in the dating game. You know, your crush is single." I should have realized that she was doing this because she thought I was a good match for my crush. Maybe my crush had even asked her friend to set me up with her. At the very least I had a chance. Possibly a very good chance. But I didn't realize that. A mixture of social stupidity because of Asperger's, the things my parents had told me, and low self esteem stopped me from understanding what was going on. I figured that at best my crush's friend was joking around and at worst she was trying to get me to embarrass myself. So I just made a goofy joke in response and moved on. In the next months as the school year went on, I started to figure I should take a shot at it anyway, because I liked this girl so much. But I could never figure out a way to ask her out. There was always something that stopped me from doing it. I questioned if I'd spent enough time with her outside of class, I didn't know if she'd gotten a boyfriend in the months since her friend had made that suggestion to me, and so on. I considered asking one of her friends but then I stopped myself because I was worried that it would get me made fun of. Then, around exam time, she announced that she was transferring to a different school about seven hours away, and left at the end of the semester. I'd missed any chance that I might have had. We lost contact. Over the next year, I tried to move on, but in the new year I was at a different campus and had next to no contact with any of the friends that I'd made in my first year. The people at this campus were not nearly as friendly as the people at the other campus. They haven't been mean or rude or anything. They're still polite and I'll talk to them after class or between classes. But as I said in another post, when it comes to hangouts that don't have to do with school, I'm left out. I have a full post about how I haven't made any new friends for years here: So yeah, I haven't made any friends since September 2017, and the ones that I made then have all kind of dropped out of contact, so the last long-term friendship that I made was all the way back in 2014. I have three people who I would consider friends and I only see one of them regularly (around once every two weeks); the other two I see between once every 2-4 months. I spend the super-vast majority (as in like 99.9%) of my time alone. Around the end of January, though, I've gotten back in touch with my old crush on social media, and a lot of the feelings I had for her have been coming back. She's doing really well at her new school. She's made tons of new friends there and she's coming up on two years with her boyfriend. I'm really happy for her. But I regret missing out on my chance more than ever now, and I miss her. Like I said in my post about how I never see my friends and I can't make any new friends, I feel like I'm just meant to always be lonely. I don't think it's because I've been stuck on this one person, either. Between April 2018 and now I've been interested in a couple of other women, but both of them turned out to have boyfriends, so obviously that didn't work out. I've tried dating apps, but I haven't had any luck. All of my friends have very limited social lives as well, so I can't meet anyone through them. I have a whole bunch more difficulties in finding friends and activities that I enjoy, which again are here: So yeah. I've always heard advice that if you miss your chance with someone you really liked, move on and learn from your mistakes when you meet someone else. But in my case, I haven't had the chance to do that. I feel like all I can do is just sit with my regret and try to accept that maybe I'm not meant to ever have a partner. TL;DR: had a chance with a great woman, missed it because of social obliviousness and low self esteem, have recognized that those were my problems, but have not had any chance to make up for it or try again.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Almost two and a half years and I haven't had the chance to learn from my mistake.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/f6zr5e/almost_two_and_a_half_years_and_i_havent_had_the/
|
ParmaProscuitto
|
2022-07-08 22:24:06
| 1,657,319,046
| null | null | 0
|
vumjun
| true
| null | 27
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/vumjun/ever_restart_a_conversation_with_somebody/
| 1
|
Started talking to this lady with a lot of interesting qualities and hobbies, super smart but apparently really busy (why is she on the app) but, she got back to me with lenhy replies despite a lenhy response time. We were going to meet up and she asked where I lived (I had already done the background check on this and we're less than an hour from.each pther albeit in different states but I played a long). It took me a day and a half to reply. Its now been a week. She could have moved on, or been busy. She hasn't unmatched me. I hate being unmatched/ ghosted. I think its genuinely sociopathic behavior. I don't want to inflict that on somebody else. Simultaneously I'm learning to give less of a fuck and just hit up other single women who don't vanish. I don't have patience to wait week after week to hear back from someone I don't know. So I was hoping for some encouraging stories of getting in touch with a match you thought you lost before I just unmatch her.
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
Ever restart a conversation with somebody
| null | 0.6
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/vumjun/ever_restart_a_conversation_with_somebody/
|
wisequackisback
|
2023-02-12 00:49:30
| 1,676,162,970
| null |
['dating app']
| 0
|
1102upd
| true
|
Question ❓
| 1
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/1102upd/dating_app_population/
| 1
|
Would people say the dating app population is reasonably representative of the general one? Or is there a bias in the kinds of people you find there? It seems like surely it must not be representative. Frankly the vast majority of people on the apps these days I just have no interest in associating with.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Dating app population
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1102upd/dating_app_population/
|
jackson6844
|
2021-06-23 04:16:57
| 1,624,421,817
| null |
['dating apps']
| 0
|
o65byf
| true
|
I Need Advice
| 5
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/o65byf/how_to_start_dating_meeting_new_people/
| 8
|
Especially with Covid, it has been practically impossible to meet new people. Moved to a new city for work which caused me to lose a lot of my friends, and there aren’t that many people (around the same age) as myself. I’m on all the dating apps, but have had no luck. Any advice is appreciated!
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
How to start dating / meeting new people
| null | 0.85
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/o65byf/how_to_start_dating_meeting_new_people/
|
Rude-Wish206
|
2024-03-11 01:54:17
| 1,710,122,057
| 0
|
['matched']
| 0
|
1bbrn20
| true
| null | 1
| 0
|
/r/dating_advice/comments/1bbrn20/which_do_you_want_more_and_which_has_worked_better/
| 1
|
A friend of mine [30M] was seeing two guys. One that liked him more [33M] but wasn't as hot and was in therapy for anxiety. Then the other likes him less [32M] but was hotter and more stable and confident. When he chose to pursue the second guy that setup this 3 person chain of unrequited love with my friend in the middle. He tried to go no contact with both of them. The anxious guy accepted just friendship from my friend but became exhausting when he had some kind of breakdown and was blowing up my friends phone with it. The hotter confident guy and my friend started off monogamous but that almost immediately switched to fwb after they had some disagreements. I asked him what he liked about them both. He said the first guy has similar interests and struggles including anxiety. He said he understands him so well because it's like he found an alternative dimension version of himself. The second guy has everything he wants in a partner. Fit, attractive, financially and emotionally stable, good communicator, happy, lots of friends, always doing something fun, relationship oriented (but not with him at the moment at least), great sex. The fact that the guy my friend is hoping to be with one day has always clearly communicated almost makes it worse. He can't say this guy has ever clearly been in the wrong so when he struggles to deal with his unrequited feelings he has nowhere to look but inward. Where as the guy my friend turned down was clearly in the wrong at times. They met once then texted daily for months and had gotten close. He clearly was hiding deeper intentions but never communicated them. Then all the sudden a while after friend let him down the guy started blowing my friend's phone about going to therapy for how his insecurities keep him from finding love. My friend tried to be supportive because he struggled with similar things. He said he didn't have the bandwidth because he's dealing with his own relationship issues, then muted him and went no contact. I think the instability and and competing affection of the guy who likes my friend made my friend invest deeper in the guy he likes but doesn't like back him as much. Right after going no contact with the first guy he ended no contact with the second. Now all 3 guys are on grindr all the time. My friend is also my roommate and I see him bringing hookups home. He said it's his coping mechanism because he's not good at letting go. TLDR I think it's interesting that my friend is in the middle of a 3 way chain of unrequited love. He connected with one guy because he never met someone he felt like was so similar to himself. And connected to another guy because he never met someone who matched his ideals so closely. For me it's difficult to find any common ground with guys but it's like the universe dropped his clone and dream guy at the same time just for lols. You don't have to answer all these... 1. Have you ever met someone who felt like you understood because they were like your mirror image? 2. Has it ever seemed like the universe read your mind and gave you your dream guy? 3. If you're single which are you looking for more? 4. If you're in love which is your partner more like? 5. Any advice on the problem specifically or generally?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Which do you want more and which has worked better?
| 1
| 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1bbrn20/which_do_you_want_more_and_which_has_worked_better/
|
Street-Secretary-110
|
2022-07-04 14:03:12
| 1,656,943,392
| null |
['tinder', 'bumble']
| 0
|
vr84vs
| true
|
Tinder/Online Dating
| 4
| 0
|
/r/dating/comments/vr84vs/am_i_destined_to_be_alone/
| 5
|
So much time and effort gone into the Bumble and tinder applications and no results ☹️😭 Any suggestions/Advice? Thanks in advance :)
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Am I destined to be alone? :’(
| null | 1
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/vr84vs/am_i_destined_to_be_alone/
|
doubtfulmurphy
|
2023-02-20 16:30:43
| 1,676,910,643
| null |
['OLD']
| 0
|
117civj
| true
| null | 37
| 0
|
/r/datingoverfifty/comments/117civj/chatgpt_generated_love_poems_is_this_a_little_off/
| 5
|
I (59f) started messaging with a guy (60) on OLD yesterday. It was a great conversation - we covered lots of interesting topics, he had multi-sentence responses (yay!) and was thoughtful and funny. We put the conversation on pause around noon to go live our lives and he said let's talk more later (I agreed.) Last night, he sent me two poems generated by ChatGPT. They are not overtly sexual or gross, but they are about us falling in love and "snuggling" and "being amorous" and living together happily after. (The quoted parts here are actual words from the poems.) I get that the guy didn't write these - and I even get that ChatGPT-generated stuff is funny, but it seems odd. If we had gone on a few dates, or knew each other better, it would be funny. I feel like perhaps he shouldn't have sent them given we had only just started messaging. My gut says this is weird but I'm curious if others see it differently. Was it just an attempt to be funny that was awkwardly timed?
|
datingoverfifty
|
t5_12ieog
|
ChatGPT- generated love poems. Is this a little off or is it funny?
| null | 0.78
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/117civj/chatgpt_generated_love_poems_is_this_a_little_off/
|
Ch00m77
|
2024-06-24 22:46:35
| 1,719,269,195
| 0
| null | 0
|
1dnqrhs
| true
| null | 6
| 0
|
/r/OnlineDating/comments/1dnqrhs/old_apps_for_enm_poly/
| 1
|
Can anyone advise what apps work best for this. Not tinder
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
OLD apps for ENM poly?
| 1
| 0.44
|
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1dnqrhs/old_apps_for_enm_poly/
|
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